AN INCONVENIENT TRAGEDY

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Cast of Characters

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.	Prometheus	.	a Titan
.	Algor	.	an ambitious Spirit
.	Carbona Dioxida	.	an airy Spirit
.	Khi-Oto	.	an Oriental Sorcerer, servant to Algor
.	Skeptica	.	a Seeress
.	Consensus	.	a Judge
.	Helios	.	God of the Sun
.	Oscar	.	a Golem
.	Three Citizens
.	A Troupe of Polar Bears
.	A Figure representing Unnatural Heat

ACT I

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Scene: A barren wasteland.
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Prometheus enters, bearing a load of wood. He sets it on the ground and builds it into a pile.
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Prometheus(recitative):	From Jove's bright realm have I come, bearing in secret a divine gift.
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He sets fire to the wood.
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Prometheus:	To Man, feeble and fleeting, Risking Jove's terrible ire, I give, for his future greatness, A spark of Heaven's fire. Though mortal, endowed with a touch Of divinity, he may aspire To mastery, sole and unchallenged, Of Earth's spacious gyre.
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The flames shoot up and from them leaps Carbona Dioxida, a spirit of fair appearance. She dances about the stage; wherever she steps, shrubs and flowers appear.
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Carbona Dioxida:	Oh, here is a marvel! Where'er I set foot Straightway there emerges A sapling or shoot. Bright flowers' shall vie With fair Iris's bow. And great oaks and pines Towards Heaven shall grow.
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She continues her dance, breathing gently on each plant, which grows taller when she does so.
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Enter Algor.
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Algor (rec.):	Oh, rash Prometheus! Thy crime has not gone undetected! At great Jove's decree, I condemn thee to cruel and endless torment. Go - thy carceral rock awaits thee!
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Exit Prometheus.
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Algor (rec.):	Though Prometheus is banished, Jove still prefers others before me. Denied advancement on Olympus, I shall seek mastery on Earth.
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He espies Carbona Dioxida.
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Algor (rec.):	Here may be an instrument fit for my purpose.
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(sings)	Oh spirit, need you rest content With twig and leaf and flower? Ally with me and we shall share The pinnacle of power. Comport yourself as I direct, Assist my enterprise: A golden harvest shall we reap As sure as sun shall rise.
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Carbona Dioxida:	With much disquiet do your words Disturb my peaceful soul. Should I abandon all I have To seek a lofty goal? You sway me so to follow you, Bedazzling my eyes, That tangled deep within my breast Both dread and longing rise.
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Algor:	Do not take counsel of your fear: It is a treach'rous guide. My wit and cunning, unsurpassed, In many ventures tried, Can nowise fail to bring success And all it may comprise. We will bestride this narrow Earth As sure as sun shall rise.
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Duet:	(Algor)	(Carbona Dioxida)
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.	She'll join with me and we shall share	I will abandon all and dare
.	A glittering golden prize.	To aid his enterprise.
.	The lure of riches and of power	Farewell to twig and leaf and flower...
.	Will always tantalize.	But is he telling lies?
.	An endless rain of wealth shall fall	Does he, behind his siren call,
.	Like manna from the skies,	Some subtle plot disguise?
.	When I attain to mastery,	No matter now, he masters me,
.	As sure as sun shall rise.	And bids me to arise.
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At a gesture from Algor, Carbona Dioxida rises and comes to him, as one in a trance.
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* * * CURTAIN * * *

ACT II

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Scene: A city square.
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Enter Skeptica; also Citizens, variously occupied. One pauses to contemplate a placard, headed "DANGER!", posted on a wall.
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Citizen 1 (rec.):	News most alarming. A prophet will come to our city today, to warn us of a doom that will befall us if we do not heed him.
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Citizen 2:	What can this portent mean? What danger lurks unseen? Oh, terror's breath is chill and keen!
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Citizen 3:	Hark! With beating drums, The stranger this way comes; Fantastic rumor round him hums.
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Enter Algor. He is accompanied by a Polar Bear in very sad condition: emaciated and limping, with patches of fur missing, and wearing an eyepatch.
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Citizen 1:	Indeed, his mien is grave; A hero or a knave? Oh, does he come to damn or save?
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Algor (rec.):	Good people, gather! A specter is haunting the land - a specter that will destroy you all, if you do not listen to my warning!
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(sings)	As you, unknowing, go about your business, Disaster is at hand! A fiend impalpable, but fierce and deadly, Will devastate your land!
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Skeptica:	Your tale is quite horrific in the telling, But why should it be true? I see your aura glow with fraud and falsehood; Why should we credit you?
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Algor:	My word alone is not the only witness: Behold this wretched bear! He'll tell you how this fiend came to his homeland, And all that she did there!
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Bear:	Life was peaceful, life was sweet, As upon the ice we lay From midwinter's endless night To midsummer's endless day. Naught, we thought, could e'er disturb This, our world of frost and rime, Then, this monster, in a flash Changed it to a tropic clime! By what sorcerous device This was done, we do not know. Yet the deed was done and now, Homeless through the world we go.
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As the Bear sings, the stage darkens and a vision appears above, of the Polar Bears lying on their ice floe. They rise and dance a ballet. Suddenly, into their midst leaps a Figure clad in fiery garments and frightfully masked. It dances a flamenco with such force that one piece of the ice after another breaks off; each time precipitating a bear into the sea. This continues until the last bear is gone. The Figure raises its arms in triumph as clouds of steam erupt from the water.
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As the vision fades, the Bear ducks into a curtained doorway and a moment later emerges as Khi-Oto, the sorcerer - recognizable because he is still wearing the eyepatch, and a ragged cloak of white fur.
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Citizen 1 (rec.):	This tale is most convincing.
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Citizen 2 (rec.):	Ask the stranger what we must do.
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Citizen 3 (rec.):	Surely he can save us.
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Skeptica (rec.):	Are we to be fooled by a mountebank and his performing bear? It is laughable!
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Citizen 1 (rec.):	It does seem rather preposterous.
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Citizen 2 (rec.):	What shall we do?
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Citizen 3 (rec.):	We will ask the Judge for a ruling!
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Exeunt all but Khi-Oto and Skeptica.
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Skeptica:	Your cheap and shoddy trick did not deceive me. I'll show you for the faker that you are. Your master, too - you'll be condemned and banished, When comes the Judge and we are at the bar.
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Khi-Oto raises his wand and points it at her.
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Khi-Oto:	You mock my art unheedingly: I use no magic shoddily, Or dabble in cheap fakery. Your power of clairvoyancy Shall struggle unavailingly And fail before my sorcery. This spell I weave so cunningly Will render mute your stridency And bridle your loquacity. Unanswered, then, our perjury, And we'll rule all triumphantly!
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Enter Consensus, in judicial robes, Algor, and Citizens.
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Consensus:	This man has argued very well, And with such wit and sense, That no one hearing him can tell Of greater eloquence. But as my task perforce requires, I must hear a rebuttal, Or equity at once expires And justice is a muddle.
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(rec.)	What have you to say? Can you refute him?
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Skeptica, horrified, finds herself unable to speak. After a long and agonizing effort, she sinks to the ground in despair.
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Consensus:	I shall my verdict now announce: Since no one did object, By rule of law I must pronounce That this man is correct.
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Exit Consensus.
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With a flash and puff of smoke, Carbona Dioxida, garbed and masked as the Figure in the vision, appears above. The Citizens cry out in terror.
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Algor (rec.):	The monster is here! And now, for the worst: YOU have summoned her!
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The Citizens cry out again.
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Algor:	Every kettle set to boil, Every candle flame, Every fire that you kindle, Calls the creature's name! . Here she is, there's no escaping, She is here to stay. Only I know how to save you, Holding her at bay. . I will sell you certain cantrips, With a wondrous charm: They will offset all her evil, Keeping you from harm.
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The Citizens, clamoring, flock to Algor and Khi-Oto, who produce amulets from a bag and trade each for a handful of gold.
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* * * CURTAIN * * *

ACT III

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At one side of the stage, the ornate facade of a palace. Before the palace is a beautiful garden, in the middle of which are a table and some chairs. In the background, an artificial waterfall flows into a pond; in the center of the pond, a more than life-size golden statue, in human form but featureless.
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At the other side, the street outside the palace grounds. The two are separated by a low wall toward the street side.
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Sitting at the curb of the street is Skeptica, reduced to poverty, in rags and holding a begging bowl.
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At the table in the garden are Algor, Carbona Dioxida, and Khi-Oto, engaged in dividing up a great heap of coins. A jewel-encrusted goblet is at the elbow of each.
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Carbona Dioxida:	You told me once, so long ago, That to us untold wealth would flow.
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Algor:	Indeed, I did. You must aver, We're richer far than once we were.
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Khi-Oto:	And still more wealth will come in time! I give a toast: success to crime!
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They drink.
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Carbona Dioxida:	The doubts I had, the deep dismay; How strange they seem to me today.
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Algor:	Such foolish qualms, so seeming bold, Turn coward at the chink of gold.
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Khi-Oto:	Aye, gold, that does not rot or rust, Or play you false. In gold I trust!
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Carbona Dioxida:	But if someday the weather cools? They'll realize they were played for fools!
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Algor:	No matter, we will spin a tale; My wit was never known to fail.
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Khi-Oto:	We'll make a fuss, a great to-do, That cooling, too, is due to you!
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Khi-Oto picks up a coin and holds it doubtfully in his hand, then bites it. With an air of disgust he starts to throw it away, then changes his mind. He goes out a gate in the wall and drops it into Skeptica's bowl. She looks up, sees Khi-Oto, and flings the coin back at him. In a sudden rage, he strikes her, knocking her to the ground, then goes back inside.
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The Citizens gather about Skeptica. One helps her to rise; she immediately falls to her knees and stretches out her arms to Heaven in an attitude of prayer.
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A blaze of light from above and Helios descends in his chariot.
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Helios:	All Earth lies open to my piercing rays: How could I fail to see such cruelty Towards her who ever was my votaress, To whom I gave the gift of prophecy. So used, and so abused! That miscreant! Where'er he hides himself, I'll hunt him down, Convict him straightaway, and then, upon His evil life I'll set a fitting crown: Condemned forever hopelessly to dwell In agony in Hades' deepest Hell.
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Citizen 1 (rec.):	I saw him flee into the palace!
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Citizen 2 (rec.):	Avenge our sister!
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Citizen 3 (rec.):	Destroy them all!
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Helios strikes the wall, which crumbles away. He leads the crowd of Citizens into the palace garden, where Algor, Carbona Dioxida, and Khi-Oto, undaunted, await him.
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Helios (rec.):	Come, evildoers, and receive your just punishment!
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Khi-Oto strides forward and raises his wand.
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Khi-Oto:	My art has such great potency That even your divinity Is subject to its mastery. I stand my ground defiantly Secure in my impunity. Now dims your luminosity, Where is your proud verbosity? Now kneel in all humility, Pay homage to my sovereignty!
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Helios's light dims; he staggers and starts to kneel; then, with a mighty effort he recovers himself. He gestures, and with a flash and thunderclap Khi-Oto's wand breaks and the latter collapses to earth.
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Khi-Oto (rec.):	Farewell, I am undone! Oh, master! (gasps) Remember the golem! (Dies.)
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Helios:	And now for you, false lying tricksters both, Who prey on credulous simplicity: I shall make plain to these good people here That warm and cool belong of right to me. Heat and humidity pervade the air When I put forth my power day to day, But chill winds, bitter frost, and snow abound When I do dim myself and turn away. You two are guilty of the grossest frauds, Your vaunted cantrips naught but useless gauds!
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Algor:	If this is true, our racket's through. Oh, this is very inconvenient.
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Carbona Dioxida:	I quite agree. Come, let us flee. That seems to be the best expedient.
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Algor:	No use in flight. He has such might. Perhaps we ought to be obedient.
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Carbona Dioxida:	I do not dare. Oh, see him glare! I rather doubt he will be lenient.
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Algor (rec.):	Wait! The golem! (Addresses the corpse of Khi-Oto) Oh, faithful servant, faithful even after death! (Commandingly) Golem, I summon thee! Do thou my bidding!
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The golden statue in the pond comes to life, revealing itself to be Oscar, the golem. It closes and grapples with Helios and throws him to the ground.
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Algor (shouting exultantly):	I swear to you, my truth SHALL prevail!
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As Helios rises, Oscar strikes him down. Instantly, the lighting dims.
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Skeptica, whose voice has returned with the death of Khi-Oto, rushes forward with a shriek.
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Skeptica (rec.):	Oh, you fools, you fools! You have destroyed us all!
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(sings)	Slain the Sun and Now departed Is the source of Life and light. Foolish people, Doomed forever To a dark and Frozen night. No more cattle In the meadow, No more harvest From the field. No more fish in Pond or river, Vines will no more Vintage yield. Fate appalling: Freezing, starving, Death shall come to Everyone. You will know the Sun's great power All the better When it's gone.
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Skeptica falls dead over the body of Helios.
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The Citizens exit, bearing the bodies of Helios and Skeptica; leaving Algor, Carbona Dioxida, and Oscar alone.
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All the flowers in the garden turn brown and wither. The lighting turns to a cold blue and snow begins to fall. Carbona Dioxida attempts a few halting steps of the dance from Act I, breathing on the wilted flowers, but to no effect.
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In the background appears Prometheus, chained to his rock; at the base of the rock lies his vulture, frozen to death.
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At a gesture from Algor, Oscar goes to the rock and frees Prometheus. Meanwhile, Algor and Carbona Dioxida break the garden table and chairs to pieces and pile them center stage, adding some ornamentation torn from the palace facade. Prometheus comes forward, carrying the vulture's corpse. He gives it to Carbona Dioxida, who begins to pluck it as Prometheus sets fire to the pile and Algor erects a spit.
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* * * CURTAIN * * *